If your life were a movie would you be the hero or victim? Try these Hollywood tests and see…

Above all, be the heroine of your life, not the victim.’ Nora Ephron

Recently, I was reading an article in Grazia magazine about sexism in film and TV. 

It turns out there are various tests you can put a movie through to determine whether it’s sexist or not.

The Sexy Lamp Test is if you can remove a woman from a story and replace her with a sexy lamp and the story still works.

Women in Refrigerators Syndrome is a plot device used in comic books where a female character is injured or killed – or locked in a refrigerator – purely to give the male heroes something to do or talk about.

The Bechdel Test is where at least two of the women in the story (who are preferably named characters) talk to each other about something other than a man. Many, many Hollywood movies fail this test.

When it comes to our life stories I think we can all – men and women – fail these tests.

So, as we approach a brand new year take a moment to reflect.

In the movie of your life story titled ‘2015’, could you have been replaced with a sexy lamp?

Were you more of a bit-player in someone else’s story – trapped in a figurative refrigerator while they got all of the exciting plotlines?

Did you spend hours, days, weeks, months, talking, stressing and pining over someone else?

When you look back now do you feel that your time and energy in 2015 could have been better spent?

If so, don’t beat yourself up – becoming a bit-player in someone else’s life story can be scarily easy.

It can happen for many different reasons but there’s usually one key underlying factor…

… low self esteem.

Deep, deep down a part of you believes that you’re not worthy of an exciting lead role in your movie called Life.

Maybe you allowed your parents, or a critical teacher, or a school bully to become your casting director.

Maybe when they told you that you were only worthy of playing a victim or a secondary role you believed them.

And so began a series of life instalments featuring the same basic plotline:

The critical parent became the critical boss.

A revolving cast of partners all played the lead while you languished in a ‘refrigerator’ – a victim to their hero – or in some cases maybe, villain.

If any of this is striking a chord with you, don’t worry.

Now is the perfect time to make a real change.

As 2016 looms into a view, see it as a blank page, ready for you to begin creating a new script.

One where you can’t be replaced by a sexy lamp.

The fact is: you are the screen-writer of your movie called Life.

And you are the casting director.

So, which role are you going to choose for yourself this year?

Hero? Or victim?

And who do you want in your supporting cast?

You get to decide.

Grab a notebook and pen and start free-writing some ideas using the questions below as prompts…

What could you do this year to make you feel excited and empowered?

How could you make yourself completely irreplaceable by a sexy lamp?

How could you free yourself from that pesky refrigerator?

Who could you help?

What quest could you go on?

How could you become the kind of hero or heroine you love to watch or read about?

How could you step into the lead role?

Free book on writing…


My book-ette, WRITING BY STARLIGHT, is full of tips and inspiration for writers.

Download it for FREE here.

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Writing By Starlight: Free Book-ette

‘And by the way, everything in life is writable about if you have the outgoing guts to do it, and the imagination to improvise. The worst enemy to creativity is self-doubt.’ Sylvia Plath
Writing can be one of the most rewarding activities in the world.
It can also be one of the most challenging.
I know this not only because of the challenges I’ve faced in my own writing career – but through my work as a writing consultant.
Over the past thirteen years I’ve worked with thousands of writers in my workshops, talks and one-to-one coaching and I’ve seen at first-hand how difficult it can be.
It’s also been hugely rewarding helping these writers overcome their obstacles and achieve their dreams.
WRITING BY STARLIGHT is a collection of the most popular posts I’ve written on writing over the past few years.
And it’s my gift to you this Christmas.
All you need to do to download it for FREE is click on the link below…
This free book-ette (49 A4 pages) contains a mixture of practical advice – on topics such as creating characters, devising plots and self-publishing – and posts to read for inspiration on those days when you’re just too tired to write, or your dream of completing your novel feels a million miles away.
Writing is one of the best ways we have of expressing ourselves, channelling our emotions and making sense of the world.
We owe it to ourselves to honour our writing dreams.
I hope this collection helps you do just that.
Ray Bradbury once said, ‘You must stay drunk on writing so reality cannot destroy you.’
Here’s to a ‘drunken’ writing life.
Here’s to writing unhindered by fear or self-doubt.
Here’s to writing by starlight.
Wishing you all a very happy, peaceful and creative Christmas.
Siobhan x
Download WRITING BY STARLIGHT for free below … and please feel free to share this post with your writing friends:

End Your Year on a High by Counting Your Blessings & Learning Your Lessons

Holy baubles, it’s almost Christmas!

But before your world becomes a crazy whirl of Baileys-supping, turkey stuffing, party going and mistletoe smooching, take a moment – a quiet moment – for you.

The beginning of December is the perfect time to pause and take stock of the fading year.

The perfect time to count your blessings, learn your lessons and figure out what and who you’d definitely like to keep in the new year – and what and who you’d like to let go of with love.

To make things super simple for you, I’ve created a template below.

All you have to do is fill in the gaps.

Take some time when you know you won’t be interrupted, copy the template into a notebook, or copy and paste it on to your pc, and let the words flow.

The best thing about 2015 has been………………..

This year, I’m really proud of the way I………………..

The most important lesson I’ve learnt is that………………..

My greatest achievements have been………………..

I’m really grateful to have had the love and support of………………..

One way of behaving that hasn’t served me this year has been………………..

Next year, I shall replace this behaviour with………………..

A situation that hasn’t brought out the best in me this year is………………..

Next year, I shall change this for the better by………………..

I’m disappointed by the way my relationship with………………..has been this year.

Next year, I shall resolve this by………………..

If I had to pick one positive word to sum up 2015 it would be………………..

In 2016, I shall bring more love and joy to the world by………………..

And if I had to pick one inspirational word / statement / quote to have as my motto for 2016 it would be………………..

Here’s to ending the year with a heart full of hope and gratitude, blissfully baggage-free.



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