Riding the Corona-coaster
This picture was of me yesterday, after I attempted to pretend that everything was OK, and get on with a work day, and get up and get dressed, and put on make-up and have a work meeting via video.
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But the truth is, everything is not OK.
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Like many of you I’m sure, I now know people who have corona virus, and so the worms of worry are digging their way deeper into my brain.
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Yesterday morning I could feel tears building.
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‘Don’t cry!’ I told myself. ‘You’ll ruin your make-up!’
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I know, FFS.
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So I cried.
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And I ruined my make-up.
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And I cancelled my work call.
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And I cried some more.
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And I heard my downstairs neighbours chatting to some other neighbours outside in their gardens and I cried because I felt lonely, and I don’t have a garden.
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And I cried because I’m missing loved ones so much and I’m so worried that they might get ill.
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I cried until my mascara was on my chin and all of my fears had been sobbed from my system.
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And then…
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And then the corona-coaster that we’re all riding on took a turn up again.
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I discovered that if I opened my sash window as high as it will go, I can actually sit in actual sunshine in my bedroom.
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So I unrolled my yoga mat and lay on the floor and pretended I was in a garden too, as the laughter and chatter and music of neighbours drifted up and in through my window.
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And then my son came in and we chatted about our hopes and dreams and his travel plans and all kinds of random shit, like should we have fish finger sandwiches for tea and how nice are Cadburys mini eggs.
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And it was so, so nice to just be – there on the floor, in the sun, in his company, completely f**king make-up free.
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PLEASE don’t push yourself too hard, too far, too fast during these strange roller coaster days.
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Listen to your body and let it ride through ALL of the emotions and feelings.
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Sending loads of love to you
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